First Time Seeing VannDa
(khmermix.com)Seila, a Khmer-American teen, visits Cambodia and attends her first VannDa concert. Unsure of herself at first, she finds pride, belonging, and connection through music, language, and culture.

It all started with a group chat. 'Yo, Seila, you down to see VannDa tonight?'
Seila stared at the message. She was only two weeks into her Cambodia trip, still getting used to the heat, traffic, and fast Khmer her cousins spoke.
'Who's VannDa?' she typed. Seconds later, five excited voice notes landed in the chatβall in Khmer.
One cousin sent a link. The beat dropped hard. Her chest vibrated with the bass. Khmer words. English lines. It felt powerful.
That night, they took tuk tuks to the concert. Lights flashed on Seila's sunglasses as the city sped by. Her cousins joked in Khmer. She laughed tooβeven if she didn't understand everything.
When they arrived, the crowd was huge. Teens wore streetwear, dyed hair, and shirts that said 'BATBANG'. Khmer was everywhere. Seila felt like an outsider.
A girl bumped into her and said, 'αα»ααααα’αΌα!' Seila froze. She didn't know how to respond.
Her cousin whispered, 'Say α’αΈααΆα β it means like, don't worry.' Seila tried. 'Ey ba...' Her cousin laughed and high-fived her.
Suddenly the lights dimmed. The crowd screamed. VannDa stepped on stageβshirtless, gold chain, glowing hair. The beat dropped.
He didn't speak. He lifted the mic. Boom. Boom. Boom. Then came the wordsβrapid Khmer, bursts of English.The crowd knew every line.
Seila didn't know all the lyrics, but she knew the hook: 'Time to Rise!' She shouted it with the others.
Her voice cracked. She didn't care. She was in itβwith them. With Cambodia. With herself.
After the show, they sat on the sidewalk eating grilled corn. 'You rapped in Khmer!' her cousin said.
Seila laughed. 'I've been practicing.' They clinked soda cans. For the first time, she didn't feel like a visitor.
The next morning, Seila opened her journal and wrote: 'I rapped in Khmer. I wasn't perfect. But I was there. That means something.'
ααΆα αΆααααααΎαααΈααΆααααααααα»ααααα»αα 'ααΈα‘αΆ α’αΌαα αααα ααΎαααααααΆαααααααα?'
ααΈα‘αΆααΎαααΆααααα ααΆαααΎαααααααα»ααΆααΆαααΈααααααΆα α α αΎααα ααααααα α·αααααΉαα’αΆααΆαααΆαα»αααα α ααΆα ααα αα·αααΆααΆαααααααΏαααααααΈααΆαα·ααΆαα
'ααααααΆ ααΆααααΆ?' ααΆαααΆαααΆαα αααααΆααααααΆαααα‘ααααααΆαααααα ααΆααΆαααααααΆααα’ααα
ααΈααΆααααΆααααααΎαααααααΆαααααααααααα αααααααΈααΆαααααΆααα ααααΌαααΆααααααααΈααααααα ααΆααααααααα ααΆαααα’αααααααα ααΆα αΆααααΌα ααΆααΆαα’αΆααααααααααΆααα
αααααα αα½ααααα·ααα»ααα»ααα ααΆαααααααααα»αααΊαα ααααΎααααα»αααΎααααααΆααααΆ αααααΈαααα»αααΏαα ααΈααΆαα·ααΆααααααΆααΆααΆαααααα ααΆαααααΎα αα ααααα·ααααα’αααααααα
ααααα½αααααα ααΈααααΆαααααΌααααα»ααααααααα αααααα»αααα ααααααααααααΆααααααααααααΆααααααααΈα ααααααα ααααα αα·αα’αΆααααααααΆ 'ααΆαααααα'α ααΆααΆαααααααΎααα αααααααΈααααααα ααΈα‘αΆα αΆααααΌα ααΆααΆαα’αΆαααααααα·ααααα·ααααα»ααααα»αα
αααααααααΈααααΆαααααααΈα‘αΆ α αΎααα·ααΆαααΆ 'αα»ααααα’αΌα!' ααΈα‘αΆαααα‘αΆααα ααΆααα·αααΉαααΆααααΌαααααΎααααΆαααΌα ααααα ααα
ααΈααΆαα·ααΆαααΆ 'αα·ααΆαααΆ α’αΈααΆα β ααΆααααααΆ αα·αα’αΈααα' ααΈα‘αΆααΆαααααα 'α’αΈααΆα...' ααΈααΆααΎα α αΎαααΆαααα
ααααΊααααΆααααααΎααααΉαα ααα»ααααααααα ααααααΆα‘αΎαααΆαβααααΆαα’αΆα αααααααααΆααααΆα αααααααΊα αααααααΈα αΆααααααΎαα
ααΆαααα·ααα·ααΆαα’αααΈααα ααΆααααΎααααααααΌα ααΌαα ααΌαα ααΌαα αααααΆααααααΆαααΆαααβααΆααΆαααααααΏαα ααααααΆαα½αα’αααααααα ααα»αααααΆααα’ααααααΆααααΆαααααΆααα’ααα
ααΈα‘αΆαα·αααααΆααααΆαααααΆααα’αααα ααα»ααααααΆααααααΆααα αααααΎαα 'Time to Rise!' ααΆααααααααΆαα½αα’ααααααα
ααααααααΆαααΌα α ααααΆαααα·ααααααααα ααΆααα ααΈαααβααΆαα½ααα½αααα ααΆαα½αααααα»ααΆα ααΆαα½ααααα½αα―αα
αααααΆααααΈααΆααααααα αα½αααα’αααα»αααΎααΎαααααααα»ααΆαααααααα»αα 'α’αΌαααααααΆααααα!' ααΈααΆαα·ααΆαα
ααΈα‘αΆααΎα α 'α’αΌαα αΆααααα αΎαα' αα½αααααααααα»αααΉαααααΌα α ααΆααΎαααααΌα ααΆααα·αααΆαα’αΆααααααααΆααΆα’ααααααααααα
ααααΉααααααΆαα ααΈα‘αΆααΎαααααα αααααα ααα» α αΎααααααααΆα 'αααα»αααααααΆααΆααΆαααααα αα·αααα’α₯αααα ααααα ααα»αααααααα»ααα ααΈαααα ααΆααΆααααα'